Beloit College
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S.Q. Uirrel's Beloit

Hometown: Beloit, Wis.
Major interests: Anthropology, physics and poetry; rummaging
Favorite place on campus: Underfoot

How he found his way to Beloit College: The story goes that my people washed up on the Beloit shore of the Rock River after the spring melt in 1846. We’ve been Beloiters ever since. With so much to eat and learn, and so many things to watch and do, we’ve never wanted to leave.

How Beloit squirrels are different: For some squirrels, it’s all about the nut race. How many nuts can you get? How many can you hide? We’re a different community. We enjoy each other and the work we do. Sure, we have to worry about storing up for the winter. But we like to smell the roses–and sample the soda cans–from time to time. If I can catch a class in the poetry garden while I do it? Even better.

Why he doesn’t travel: Cars. That’s one reason. They look fun, but I’ve seen them squash people. No thanks. I stick to the campus. Plus, why leave? We’ve got students from 40-plus countries and almost every state, welcome speakers from around the world, and even pitch music festivals on the lawn. Traveling is for the birds. I mean, that’s all they seem to do, right?

Why he’s (slightly) jealous of turtles: I get why the turtle is Beloit’s academic mascot. Turtle Creek and the Turtle Indian Mound have been here for something like 5,000 years. But I think squirrels deserve some official acknowledgment too. Until we get it, we’ll have to be content with being ubiquitous. Ubiquitous: isn’t that a great word?

Why he’s (really) jealous of Beloit students: When you’re a squirrel, you resemble everyone around you. Big bushy tail, sharp gnawing teeth, little scratching paws. Sure, there’s some variation—I happen to think I have particularly nice whiskers—but mostly we’re all the same. Beloit students get to be so different– in dress, interests, hair color, etc. Plus, they get to play Ultimate Frisbee. My uncle tried to pioneer a squirrel version using the lid from a soup can. Took his brother’s… geesh… I can’t even say it. Let me just say that the sight of a Campbell’s soup can still makes my mother faint. That said, the game sure looks fun. I’d love to try it.

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